1. Sometimes you’re just not in the right mood to use a squat toilet.
  2. The Chinese can stretch your neck in ways you just cannot imagine.
  3. Stretching shops exist.
  4. Chatting with your Masseur via Google Translate is kinda cool.
  5. Some Dim Sum cannot be picked up with chopsticks.
  6. Dumplings with soup inside wasn’t the best invention, China!
  7. Chinese Lettuce is just iceberg, you’re not fooling anyone.
  8. Each time I have sat down at a Chinese tea table, I have chosen the wrong place.
  9. I am rather getting used to eating prawns with their shells on.
  10. Shanghai is mostly one big shopping centre, and some buildings with lights on.
  11. Your bowel will give you less warning whilst in China.
  12. The waitresses are super alert, it’ll be hard not to catch their eye.
  13. Why are Asian men’s legs only hairy near the base, is the hair slipping off?
  14. Pub-goers are often seen having a bowl of fruit with their beer.
  15. I cannot get my head around a high class restaurant being sited in the middle of a  shopping centre.
  16. If you work in a convenience store, the chances are you’ll hear the same jingle 20,000 times during your shift.
  17. As I walked into a lunch joint alone, the waitress announced something to the fellow diners. What was this?
  18. A bad smell could occur anywhere, at any time.

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